Post by nickiemcnichols on May 8, 2012 8:17:10 GMT -5
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, “What setting do I use on the washing machine”?”
It depends”, I replied. “What does it say on your shirt”?
He yelled back, “OHIO STATE”!
And they say blonds are dumb....
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A couple was lying in bed. The man said, “I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world”... The woman replied, “I'll miss you”...
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“It's just too hot to wear clothes today”, Jack said as he stepped out of the shower..“Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this”?
“Probably that I married you for your money”, she replied.
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Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor ------------
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Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
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Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
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Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy. .
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Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
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Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..
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Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
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While creating husbands, God promised women that good and ideal husbands would be found in all corners of the world……...
………….Then He made the earth round.
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It depends”, I replied. “What does it say on your shirt”?
He yelled back, “OHIO STATE”!
And they say blonds are dumb....
------------ --------- --------- --------- ----
A couple was lying in bed. The man said, “I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world”... The woman replied, “I'll miss you”...
------------ --------- -------
“It's just too hot to wear clothes today”, Jack said as he stepped out of the shower..“Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this”?
“Probably that I married you for your money”, she replied.
------------ --------- --------- --------- ----
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor ------------
------------ --------- --------- --------- ----
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
------------ --------- --------- --------- ----
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy. .
------------ --------- --------- --------- ------
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
------------ --------- --------- --------- ---
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..
------------ --------- --------- --------- ----
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -
While creating husbands, God promised women that good and ideal husbands would be found in all corners of the world……...
………….Then He made the earth round.
------------ --------- --------- --------- ----
